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Increase Your Team’s Curiosity – Roger Schwarz – Harvard Business Review
“… By combining transparency and curiosity, teams keep the discussion focused, get all the information on the table, learn why members have different views, and create solutions that take into account all team members’ perspectives. As a result these teams have stronger performance and better working relationships.
When leaders learn that they aren’t asking question, they often overcompensate by asking a lot of questions and withholding their own views. This leaves team members feeling interrogated rather than engaged.
Not all questions are created equal. To develop an effective team, it’s not enough to ask questions. You have to be genuinely curious. When you are genuinely curious, you ask questions to learn what others are thinking. When you aren’t genuinely curious, you ask questions to make a point: rhetorical questions.
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Here are a few questions you can ask yourself to determine whether what you are about to ask is a genuine question (like question 2 above.) If you answer yes to any of the following questions, the question you’re about to ask isn’t genuine.
Do I already know the answer to my question?
Am I asking the question to see if people will give the right (preferred) answer?
Am I asking the question to make a point?
Another way to figure out if you’re about to ask a rhetorical question is to give yourself what I call the “You Idiot” test. If the question still sounds natural with “you idiot” at its end, don’t ask it. It’s really a statement — a pointed rhetorical question. Change the question to a transparent statement that shares your view, including your reasoning and your feelings. Then add a genuine question that helps you learn more about the situation. …”
Do I already know the answer to my question?
Am I asking the question to see if people will give the right (preferred) answer?
Am I asking the question to make a point?
Another way to figure out if you’re about to ask a rhetorical question is to give yourself what I call the “You Idiot” test. If the question still sounds natural with “you idiot” at its end, don’t ask it. It’s really a statement — a pointed rhetorical question. Change the question to a transparent statement that shares your view, including your reasoning and your feelings. Then add a genuine question that helps you learn more about the situation. …”